Chapter Two

     I was three years old when I went to Sea World with my family. There are only two things that I remember about that day. The first thing I remember is how ridiculous my face was on the picture from one of my very first roller coaster rides. The second thing was when we went to go see Free Willy. It was without a doubt my favorite part of the day. Watching that gigantic whale jump in and out of the water and splashing those in the crowd, made me want to body slam into the pool. For obvious reasons, I couldn't do what I wanted to do the most that day; go swimming with Willy. As cliché as it sounds, I felt like a fish out of water.
     Nowadays I don't dream of going swimming with giant animals. Honestly, it would scare the heck out of me. But I do however still feel as though I'm on the outside looking in to what I want; always watching my dreams but never reaching for them. Thoughts of self doubt seem to never leave me alone. All that I hear my thoughts say is, "You're not good enough. You'll never be able to do that. You're nobody special." But the thing that self doubt doesn't understand is that no one was good enough. No one imagined that they'd one day be living the way that they are now. Everyone believed that at one time, they weren't special. But everybody starts somewhere. Every professional was once a beginner, even Willy.
     I often have people ask me the question, "What are you planning to do with your future?" My first reaction to this is always that it's such a strange question to ask someone. How do you plan for the future? I mean... I thought that God had that under control. I'm only eighteen years old, and I still feel like I'm that awkward thirteen year old girl who walked into a private school for the first time. But over the years, I've learned that the only difference between then and now is that I no longer feel that I need to satisfy those around me. In fact, I've finally reached the time in my life where I'm focusing on what would make The Lord proud. And let me tell you, I don't need a college diploma to get into heaven. Or any diploma for that matter.
     So, from now on, I'm going to do what I truly love.  And yeah, I might not be considered "successful" or "rich", but at least I'll have fun with what I do. One of my favorite quotes is, "If you love your job, you'll never work a day in your life." Starting right now, instead of watching Free Willy have all of the fun, I'm going to dive head first into the tank with him. Yes, I might get eaten, but if I survive, I'll get to say that I lived out my dream. And how many people can say that?
                                                              PS. I love this song.